Movie Reviews

Crossroads

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If Paramount is in dire need of a break-out quote for Britney Spears’ combined feature-film debut and big-screen product-placement campaign (bored viewers can distract themselves by counting the number of times Clairol Herbal Essence and Pepsi products find their way into the frame), I offer them this: “It’s better than Glitter!” Beyond that I’m not […]

Crocodile Dundee In Los Angeles

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Crocodile Dundee in Los Angeles –an unashamedly old-fashioned and surprisingly entertaining comedy-thriller from Paul Hogan — is by no means a great movie, but neither is it the unqualified disaster it might so easily have been. Though Hogan’s non-Crocodile Dundee career has been less than spectacular, you have to give the guy credit for being […]

Crazy/Beautiful

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The main problem with Crazy/Beautiful is that it’s neither. Too bad. If the filmmakers had allowed it to go all-out crazy, the movie might have soared. There’s stand-out performances by all the actors, fantastic cinematography of Los Angeles’ highly divergent cultures, and a sizzling soundtrack. But with pat solutions, illogical character leaps, and a formulaic […]

Cradle 2 The Grave

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To enjoy Cradle 2 the Grave, you have to leave your intellect in the theater parking lot. During the turbo-charged 100 minutes of the film, all you can think (if you can think at all with the riveting sights and sounds on the screen) is: Wow, this is one fantastic action movie! So what if […]

Corky Romano

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In Corky Romano, Chris Kattan (TV’s Saturday Night Live) careens onto the feature-film scene in a mindless, maniacal comedy that is funny enough to distract anyone from today’s real news headlines. The title character is the goofy youngest son of a low-level Mafia don who hasn’t seen the family in years. Away from them, Corky […]

Conspiracy Theory

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There is more than what (or whom) meets the eye to the obviously talented Mountain Xpress staffers — one of them, production artist Jean Williams, turns out to be a hobbling (she recently broke her ankle) encyclopedia of information about film. I had been bugging her to critique a movie, but she was too shy […]

Confessions Of A Dangerous Mind

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According to TV producer Chuck Barris — the man who foisted The Dating Game, The Newlywed Game and The Gong Show on a distressingly willing American public — there was more to his life than met the eye. Granted, it would be hard to imagine that there could be less than met the eye. It’s […]

Comedian

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First a confession: I have never seen an episode of Seinfeld, so the name of Jerry Seinfeld holds no sacred magic for me. I have only the vaguest memories of ever having seen him during his years as a standup comic. In other words, my exposure to him via this cinema verite documentary was an […]

Collateral Damage

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When Der Arnold’s character — the improbably named Gordon Brewer — loses his passport in Collateral Damage, someone did him the favor of shaving a couple of years off his age for the insert shot of the document. Too bad, it never occurred to anyone in the make-up department to do him a similar favor. […]

Clockstoppers

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If I was a 12-to-15-year-old boy, I’d probably love Clockstoppers, but if I was a 12-to-15-year-old boy, I’d probably think I was too cool to go see Clockstoppers (the Nickelodeon imprint alone would assure that). That’s the curse of a movie like this: It’s merely passable entertainment to an adult (think after-school special with better […]

City Of God

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Despite its almost impossibly glowing reputation, I have to say I approached City of God (Cidade de Deus) with serious trepidation. I expected this Brazilian import to be anything but my cup of Lapsang Souchong — no matter how worthy the film might be. I don’t know if calling something as visceral, unpleasant and disturbing […]

City By The Sea

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Not too long ago someone asked me who I thought was the better actor, Robert DeNiro or Al Pacino. My immediate response was to name DeNiro, but with City by the Sea coming on the heels of Showtime contrasted with Pacino’s recent work in Insomnia and Simone, I think the balance of power is shifting, […]

Chicago

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Yes, it’s big and clever and inventive. First-time theatrical feature director Rob Marshall (who helmed the TV version of Annie) and screenwriter Bill Condon (Gods and Monsters) have done a splendid job of transferring a stage show to the screen — brilliantly preserving its theatricality without ever making the proceedings seem stagey. I admit: I […]

Changing Lanes

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I have no earthly idea just what it is that so many critics are seeing in this monumentally stupid waste of an astonishing array of talent. There are more plot holes, unrealistic coincidences and unbelievable contrivances per square inch of Changing Lanes than there are cars on F.D.R. Drive (where the movie’s plot is set […]

Cats & Dogs

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Grrrrrrr. Hoodwinked again. Cats & Dogs is not a treat. In fact, I give it the Bare Bone award for the most misleading preview of 2001. Like the rest of the packed audience, I recently fell for the furry-fun promised by the previews and was eager for an afternoon of anthropomorphic amusement. Cats & Dogs […]

Catch Me If You Can

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Steven Spielberg is back with a more accessible, viewer friendly film than either A.I. or Minority Report — and Catch Me If You Can is apt to ingratiate him to admirers who were not thrilled by the direction those other two films indicated he was taking. Many will doubtless view this as a return to […]

Cast Away

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I have to confess up front that I am one of the few people who did not in the least admire Forrest Gump, so I was looking forward to the reteaming of star Tom Hanks and director Robert Zemeckis with the same degree of enthusiasm usually reserved for a festival of Dean Martin/Jerry Lewis films. […]

Captain Corelli’s Mandolin

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With John Madden at the helm and Nicolas Cage as an opera-singing Italian soldier (complete with dubious accent), Captain Corelli’s Mandolin very easily could have turned into Mussolini in Love. Fortunately, that didn’t happen. Granted, the film has its share of problems — something Universal signaled loud and clear when they pushed the release back […]

Can’t Hardly Wait

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Teen-reporter Maggie West — fresh from a stint on the journalistic high-road reviewing Les Miserables — now romps curbside in order to scope out the graduating senior class of Huntington Hills High. Frankly, I could hardly wait to send her out there … movies don’t get much more “teenier” than Can’t Hardly Wait, and the […]

But I’m A Cheerleader

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Oh, how this reviewer wanted to love this movie. From the moment I heard its title, so campy — yet so girly — I hounded Ashely to let me screen it. In a satisfyingly ironic twist, I watched Cheerleader on the anniversary of the day my first love relegated me to the closet (along with […]

Bulletproof Monk

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Yes, it’s silly and stupid. I can also add that it’s not terribly well made. The lighting is questionable, the editing is ragged and the process-work (oh, yeah, those monks really appear to be battling on a mile-high rope bridge) looks like state of the art, circa 1962. Most of early reviews of Monk pummel […]