Letter: The scoop on Mumpower’s dog’s poop

Write to Mountain Xpress
Graphic by Lori Deaton

Though Mountain Xpress cartoonist Randy Molton long ago surrendered to liberal myopia, I admire his creative talents. His recent cartoon lamenting my lamentations on socialism was no exception [Dec. 13, Xpress].

Of additional interest were the liberties taken in the follow-up comments.

Case in point, the Mountain Xpress reader who crafted the following observation [on mountainxcom]: “I would also like to add that Doctor Mumpower owns a beautiful Standard Poodle. Carl faithfully walks the dog daily at 9 am from his office on College Street throughout downtown. Every time I see them downtown, it appears that Carl does not own any Doggie Waste Bags. The dog poops, Carl no scoops. Please, can we set up a Go Fund Me? Dr. Carl Mumpower Doggie Waste Bag Drive, 2017. Times are tough and the struggle is real.”

Experience demonstrates that far too many progressives similarly embrace vilifying the opposition and imaginative fabrication — like myopia — as irresistible sirens.

Pepper is a black and white bird dog. We don’t walk downtown, we run downtown, and we do it four days a week somewhere between 6:30 and 9 a.m. I always have a doggie bag, and I always clean up after my charge.

Well, maybe there was one exception. A few years back, I forgot her accessory and had to rely on a copy of the Mountain Xpress to take care of business.

As a counter to my antagonist’s “Go Fund Me” entreaty, I wanted to extend a “Go Catch Me” proposal. It’s my pleasure to offer a $100 reward for anyone who can furnish a photo of me skipping pet responsibilities — anywhere — anytime.

I can be trusted to clean up after my dog. It’s unfortunate that when it comes to myopia, vilification and fabrication, there’s no matching means to clean up after humans.

— Carl Mumpower
Asheville

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9 thoughts on “Letter: The scoop on Mumpower’s dog’s poop

  1. Lulz

    LOL, a while back I saw a “poor’ person urinating out in the open at Pritchard Park. I even think the LIEberals all sat around and cheered on how their big government and moral preening was helping him to relieve himself. To the LIEberals, that’s good because that’s the type of society they want. A third world place where public urination and defecation is termed PROGRESS. But since you are their ideological opponent, your ACTIONS have to live up to HIGHER standards than the LIEberals hold others to. Because in order for LIEberals to “progress”, they have to lie about others who present a danger to their ideology and corrupt way of thinking.

  2. Enlightened Enigma

    So how stupid was the complainer that could not tell a standard poodle from a setter ?

      • Enlightened Enigma

        stupid enough to be embarrassed, but too ignorant to realize it … AVL is full of ’em …

  3. NFB

    I’ve no doubt whatsoever that former Councilman Mumpower cleans up after his dog. He’s been shoveling that stuff ever since he first ran for office nearly 20 years ago and ever since he left public office why would he stop now?

  4. The Real World

    Such nasty, unhappy people. Look how most of the comments here line-up with the fake accusation made and subsequent nasty comments it engendered. There sure is predictability and consistency in that.

    Y’all should learn to love yourselves and other people more. It’s a choice.

    • bsummers

      Yes, by all means trust the anonymous sockpuppet who’s never spread fake news, over the original eyewitness who did put his name on the comment.

      Speaking of, how many people saw that original online dogpoop comment? Maybe a few dozen of us hardcore readers? Now, thanks to Carl’s insatiable need to see his name in print, everyone in town knows that there are allegations that he doesn’t clean up his dogs poop. It’s BCGOP 101, people. When you’ve got bad news about yourselves, even if it may not be true, make sure to spread it far and wide.

      Don’t worry Carl. I’m sure the BCGOP Chairman who comes along next will clean up after you.

    • bsummers

      Besides, Dr. Carl recently compared believing in the political left to pedophilia. He deserves all the “nasty comments” he gets, IMO.

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