Author:   Justin Souther

The Story: During the Civil War, a poor Mississippi farmer leads a rebellion against the Confederate Army. The Lowdown: A film too aware of its own importance —  and it shows, with its endless speechifying, solemn tone and laborious pacing.

The Story: After reuniting with a long-lost high school buddy, a straitlaced accountant finds himself tied up in an unexpected game of espionage. The Lowdown: A generally harmless, sometimes amusing comedy thanks to its leads, but with little else memorable to offer beyond its run-of-the-mill buddy cop trappings.

The Story: After resurfacing, magician troupe The Four Horseman must battle wits with a tech genius. The Lowdown: A needlessly convoluted and nonsensical sequel that’s occasionally entertaining, mostly in unintentional ways.

The Story: A recently paralyzed man and his shy caretaker find themselves falling for one another. The Lowdown: A cliché-filled romance of the tear-jerking variety that goes on too long and does nothing new, but is barely sort of saved by a solid cast and a degree of complexity.

The Story: Alice returns to Underland to save the Mad Hatter. The Lowdown: Despite a similar cast and comparable visual style, this sequel to 2010’s Alice in Wonderland feels like an uninspired cash grab.

The Story: After being pillaged by marauding pigs, a colony of birds sets out to get their revenge. The Lowdown: While a handsome-looking animated film, there’s not much here beyond some slapstick and a thin, pointless plot, even by cartoon standards.

The Story: After their son brings home a haunted artifact from the Grand Canyon, a family finds themselves terrorized by ancient spirits. The Lowdown: A run-of-the-mill attempt at a scarefest, with dull characters, little atmosphere and zero scares.

The Story: Captain America becomes an outlaw after Ironman sidles up to the U.N. to force superheroes to become registered government agents. The Lowdown: A generally entertaining and faithful comic book adaptation that suffers from some spotty direction and too much superhero padding.

The Story: After his new kitten is kidnapped, a heartbroken stoner and his square cousin infiltrate an LA gang to get him back. The Lowdown: A decidedly overdrawn and one-note comedy with a few high points, but a whole lot of disappointing lows.

The Story: As two supernatural sisters attempt to take over the Enchanted Forest, a group of daring fighters tries to stop them. The Lowdown: Despite a good cast and some neat visuals, a pointless attempt at forcing a new series on the world, one that simply doesn’t have the verve or story to be of…

The Story: With their neighborhood falling to pieces, a local barber decides to bring change to his community. The Lowdown: A surprisingly welcome visit from a long (somewhat) forgotten series that’s far from perfect, but gets points for being both entertaining and pertinent (although perhaps a bit pat).

The Story: After running afoul of the law, a former billionaire tries to rehabilitate her image with the help of a former underling. The Lowdown: Another noisy, grating comedic vehicle for Melissa McCarthy. Even if you enjoy her onscreen presence, there’s little to latch onto with something so idiotically obnoxious.

The Story: A teacher, in trouble after discussing Jesus in her classroom, turns to a passionate lawyer to save her job and stick up for her faith. The Lowdown: More faith-based proselytizing, this time styled as a dreary, languid courtroom drama. Solely for the converted.

The Story: Dealing with the stress of an angsty teen, Toula must help her parents throw their own big, fat Greek wedding when they realize their wedding certificate was never signed. The Lowdown: About all this genteel comedy has going for it is its general good-naturedness, with the rest of the film a dull mishmash…

The Story: Traveling through a post-apocalyptic wasteland, our heroine Tris discovers more about the dystopian world she lives in. The Lowdown: More self-serious, noisy, sci-fi nonsense, only with no proper ending and more big-name cast members wasted.

The Story: The story of Jesus’ childhood. The Lowdown: Slow, long, plodding, self-serious, humorless religious tale that adds little to the story of Jesus and less to cinema as a whole.

The Story: A journalist, bored with her career and life, becomes a war correspondent in Afghanistan. The Lowdown: An unfocused comedy/drama that never settles on a tone, but which remains likable and watchable, thanks to a small extent to Tina Fey.

The Story: An awkward, unathletic Brit ends up an unlikely Olympic ski-jumper. The Lowdown: Simplistic and cliched like so many other uplifting sports films, but with a enough charm and a pleasantness to work as simple, feel-good entertainment.

The Story: The based on a true story of Jesse Owens as he heads to the 1936 Olympics in Berlin and the heart of Nazi Germany. The Lowdown: Despite the obvious importance (both historically and currently) of Owens’ story, Race is little more than a by-the-book uplifting sports film, with every cliché this entails.

The Story: After tragedy and years in hiding, legendary male supermodel — and general idiot — Derek Zoolander comes out of hiding and quickly finds himself entangled in intrigue and conspiracy. The Lowdown: A dull and uninspired sequel to a pretty good comedy, one that lacks verve and instead relies on rehashed jokes and pointless…

The Story: A hunky veterinarian falls for his dreamy neighbor before maudlin tragedy steps in. The Lowdown: Abhorrently dull cheese of the kind only Nicholas Sparks’ pedigree can whip up — schmaltzy and oozing with melodrama, and with zero chemistry from its leads.