The Profiler

The descriptions of fan qualities and quirks are intended to be a playful take on what’s unique about all of us. The world would be a better place if everyone went out to see more live music.

The Suspect: Camper Van Beethoven and Cracker

These two groups helped define alternative music, CVB in the ‘80s, and Cracker in the ‘90s. Since CVB re-formed in 1999, frontman David Lowery performs in both bands. Remember when people used to buy entire records instead of the occasional iTunes download? Each band will perform all the songs from their respective classic albums, Key Lime Pie and Kerosene Hat

Can Be Found: The Orange Peel, Thursday, May 12.

RIYD (Recommended if You Dig): The Replacements, Meat Puppets.

You Should Go If: You believe the measure of a man lies in his cumulative AmEx miles; your fashion sense could be described as bowling league meets hipster; you have high hopes that Prince William is going to make receding hairlines blow up; the most disappointing thing about the 21st century (so far) is … there’s still no combination Valium/Zyrtec medication on the market.

The Suspect: Brett Dennen

He’s been named one of Rolling Stone’s 10 artists to watch, and Paste magazine writes that Dennen leads “a rock-steady, surprisingly hard-hitting band, the lanky redhead swivels around the stage … reminiscent of the New York Dolls’ David Johansen.” The androgynous crooner just released Loverboy last month, his fourth studio album full of sweet power-pop.

Can Be Found: The Orange Peel, Sunday, May 15.

RIYD: Paul Simon, Sean Hayes, Jason Mraz.

You Should Go If: You prefer parade waves over fist bumps; Glee has restored your faith in humanity; you consider anything with fruit filling healthy; the most disappointing thing about the 21st century (so far) is … that you’re still mostly known as the guy who always jams the copier.

The Suspect: Garage a Trois

Marco Benevento and Galactic Drummer Stanton Moore make up half of this New Orleans quartet that calls itself “the most dangerous instrumental band on the scene today.” This improvisational psychedelic-jazz-rock band just released their fifth album last month, Always Be Happy, But Stay Evil.

Can Be Found: Pisgah Brewing, Friday, May 13.

RIYD: Medeski, Martin & Wood, Marco Benevento Trio.

You Should Go If: After 18 months of intense training you’ve finally mastered the one-eyebrow raise; you’re a founding member of a light-saber fencing league; most women find your inability to communicate without air quotes endearing; the most disappointing thing about the 21st century (so far) is … that NASA isn’t sending people to the moon anymore.

The Suspect: WSNB (We Sing Nasty Blues)

The event description of the band promises, “They ain’t soft, pretty or subtle, and they don’t do many ballads.” Sounding like Dr. John, if Dr. John had a two-pack-a-day habit, singer Willie Shane Johnston grows and howls over blistering guitar riffs as this N.C. band serves up scorching delta blues.

Can Be Found: White Horse, Black Mountain, Friday, May 13.

RIYD: Stevie Ray Vaughan, Muddy Waters.

You Should Go If: Whenever possible, you back your car into a parking space; you consider hiring a private detective part of the natural course of a relationship; your baby’s first word was “bacon”; the most disappointing thing about the 21st century (so far) is … Lady Gaga.

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6 thoughts on “The Profiler

  1. boatrocker

    Muddy Waters played Chicago style blues. SRV played Texas style blues. Delta blues is different, but don’t worry about facts, take the opinion of the writer to tells you what to go see. “Be on the scene” that is decided for you, plebes.

  2. ironhead

    Do not go to Mike’s Side Pocket on Friday the 13th. If you do go, do not hang around until 9 pm when the band starts. If you are there, do not listen to them. They don’t look right. They will never have a cool video. They don’t have cool tats, or cool hair, or cool anything.

  3. Harmonator

    The Delta Blues Museum in Mississippi just opened a Muddy Waters wing so don’t tell them that he never played any Delta blues.

  4. boatrocker

    Yeah, I guess if you want to waste pixels splitting hairs with that, sure, Muddy’s “delta” blues too as he started out there playing.

    Posthumously though, Muddy was known for electrifying certain instruments and helping to create the “Chicago” sound. But if just being from Mississippi is the only criteria, go ahead and put John Lee Hooker, Elvis and Hank Sr. under the “delta blues” label too as they all started playing there. I think I made my point well enough with the first post, but if not, here you go.

  5. Harmonator

    wow, you’re calling me out about wasting pixels and splitting hairs debating whether or not a band called We Sing Nasty Blues is Delta or Chicago…did you actually read your own posts?

  6. boatrocker

    Yes, harmonator, I read my own posts.

    No, I don’t give a hooey what WSNB plays, but to call them Delta blues and them compare them to somebody like Muddy (a heckuva more influetial Chicago blues player then Delta) or Stevie Ray Vaughn who specialized in big note Texas blues simply shows that the author has no background in a certain style of music. Thus I’ll make up my own mind who to go hear perform. Are your new meds working?

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