Praise for the Asheville Disclaimer

I am consistently impressed by the quality and originality of the quirky news stories that the Asheville Disclaimer brings to light in our region — stories of the little people that might otherwise be overlooked by major media outlets.

In the June 1 Disclaimer piece, "Local Company Offers Organic Way to Rid Your Lawn of Lawn-Mowing Goats,” I found myself in a state of shocked awe due to the ingenuity of local business owners who thought up this permaculture-based biological solution to cope with a major issue confronting our community. I myself had been considering autonomous measures for goat riddance, such as pit traps and air-to-ground missiles, but the solution that this featured company offers is so much more elegant and fitting for the environmentally conscious character of our diverse mountain village.

And in the June 8 issue, I was thrilled to read about "Asheville Lifestyle Packages," proving to me that there really are companies out there who care about the well being of Asheville newcomers, the most important people who live here. I recently moved here from Syria, where I had become acclimated to custom services such as naked-maiden butt dusting and receiving my Za’atar-encrusted, marinated lamb heart served on a bed of university-students' ears, and I am relieved to find that there is a serving class in Asheville that will help to continue this tradition of catering to the specialized needs of confused immigrants such as myself.

Again, thank you, Asheville Disclaimer, for your probing investigative journalism, and I look forward to your future exposes.

— Zev Friedman

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4 thoughts on “Praise for the Asheville Disclaimer

  1. Jake

    You may have heard that the Onion satire publication is campaigning for a Pulitzer Prize. Had I a vote, I would lend my support to the Disclaimer, as it consistently provides some of the finest investigative journalism available in Western North Carolina

  2. Big Al

    Forget goats, set the dobermans on the panhandlers, hippies and buskers downtown. A healthy lean diet with lotsa veggies and marijuana is full of fiber.

    As for the “Lifestyles Packages”, I cry foul for false advertising. The yuppies pictured would be rejected by the River Arts District and Montford as too square and by Biltmore Village as too common. And Swannanoa is NOT part of Asheville, despite the ambitions Suburu Socialists of city hall.

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