Sixteen-year-old North Buncombe High School sophomore — aka “pirate boy” — Bryan Killian caused a stir this week by donning an eye patch. Professing devotion to “Pastafarianism” (the tenets of the Church of the Flying Spaghetti Monster), which holds that pirates are deities, Killian has insisted his swashbuckling regalia is a testament to his religious faith, and that he should be able to wear it in school.
North Buncombe administrators disagree, and this week they suspended Killian, causing an instant media maelstrom. Below, excerpts from an interview with Killian conducted last night by freelance writer Jason Bugg. Pick up next week’s Xpress for more on the story of the student/pirate/First Amendment crusader.
— Jon Elliston, news editor
Mountain Xpress: Can you give a brief synopsis of Pastafarianism?
Killian: It is a religion created [as] a reply to them trying to teach creationism and intelligent design in Kansas schools, and [it was] basically created it to say, “If you are going to teach intelligent design, then you are going to have to teach [our] way of intelligent design.” … A flying spaghetti monster created us all and we were first pirates.
MX: What prompted you to dress this way?
Killian: I’d wanted to get my pirate regalia together, but I didn’t have the time, but I finally got it all together, so I figured that [on] Monday, “Why not wear it, since they are having the North Buncombe Revolution” [editor’s note: The North Buncombe Revolution is a Christian revival that is going on after school hours at North Buncombe High School]. … So I figured, “Why not do this during school?” as just like a quiet protest in a sense.
MX: Can you go into detail about how and why you were punished?
Killian: Well, on my first day I just wore the eye patch, and she [the assistant principal] said, “You don’t need to be wearing this.” So I explained to her that this was my religion, and that this is what I believe. She gave me [in-school suspension] that day. The second day, everything went cool … and then at lunch the same thing happened as the first day, except that I walked outside and put it on. I figured that you can wear a hat outside, why not an eye patch? So I went outside, and put the eye patch on and everything and then all of a sudden, it gets quiet, and [the assistant principal] walks out and says, “You come with me.” … They start yelling at me, saying that this is the third time that they told me not to wear the eye patch. I pretty much said that this is the third time I’ve told you that this is what I believe, this is my religion. It doesn’t matter how stupid it is. … In my eyes, Christianity sounds pretty stupid, but this is what I believe, and I should be able to believe it. She said that this is not exactly what you believe, but you shouldn’t wear an eye patch because it’s causing a disruption in the classroom. So the school resource officer said that “if you need me to drag him out of school, I will.” I think that that was totally unnecessary. Because I wasn’t doing anything criminally wrong, I was wearing an eye patch.
MX: How much of this is you pushing people’s buttons and trying to see what you are able to get away with?
Killian: It’s not exactly that I enjoy it; it’s that if I feel something is not right, then I’ll push it. That’s how I am.
well i certainly know how distracted *I* get by eye patches…
what if he really needed an eye patch? that would be acceptible and a “non-distraction”?
i applaud bryan for having beliefs he’s willing to take a stand on and doing it in a thoughful and totally innocent way.
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Great report! But it’s Arrrh, not Argh. Arrrh is pirate for “um” or “yes.” Argh is Charlie Brown for “Not again!”
Good work, Jason.
Does the boy have a wooden leg or a parrot?
Have you been touched by his noodly appendage?
RAmen
With all do respect I do believe that school administrators have begun the process of over stepping their boundaries. If schools can take time for a moment of silence then Killian should be allowed to wear an eye patch if he wants as it is not threatening nor advocating violence in any way. I think the assistant principal needs a subscription of chill pills and should be directing here police efforts to the drug use going on in the bathrooms and parking lots or teach! Wow, what a novel concept.
The disruption in the classroom is being caused by overreaction of the administrators.