Well, now we’ve got coronavirus in the mountains! So, should we follow our illustrious senator’s lead, sell a million and a half shares of stock and retire in luxury?
Wait. We don’t have stock. Should we sell our livestock? We can’t find any buyers. Up here in the mountains we can’t even think about retiring. Thank God Dollar General, Target and Ingles are still open. That’s where we’re working. We’re working at Sonic for $4/hour. Plus tips. Who tips at Sonic? We’re waitstaff working for $2/hour. What if our restaurants close? We relied on tips to make ends meet. Keep that shelter in place order from becoming law. At least you’re doing that right.
Here’s a tip, old white men: How about some help for the little people? Should the slush fund only benefit billionaires? Come on. Have a heart, senators. Show us you care. Think about the people who got you elected.
— Leslie Gaidi