Jest of WNC 2018: The Humor Issue
Volume
25
/ Issue 24
Cover Photography Credit:
Brent Brown
Western North Carolina was a wild and woolly place to be in 2018 — at least according to our local bears and assorted hometown celebrities. See whether you can tell fact from fiction in Xpress’ annual humor issue. (Hint: Check out the ‘Fake News’ icons if you’re feeling a bit unsure). Read on for all the shocking details!
arts
Local author shares mindfulness strategies in new book
Bryan Robinson, a licensed psychotherapist and professor emeritus at UNC Charlotte, wrote #Chill to leverage his expertise on work addiction for a broader audience. "[The book is] not just for…(SATIRE) Crowd-source campaigns worth the ante
Inspired by "Emily Dickinson's Patreon" by Riane Konc in The New Yorker, Xpress dreamed up for arts-related Kickstarter projects (led by local and international personalities) that would surely be worth…Lake Street Dive returns to Asheville for an Orange Peel show
“We try to incorporate one or two covers into any set,” Mike "McDuck" Olson says. “Because covers tend to be the way that our fans gained entry into our music.”Harlem Globetrotters to make a fun-filled stop in Asheville
Don’t doubt that the Globetrotters are all-American athletes. They defeated the world champion Minnesota Lakers in 1948 and ’49, victories that helped integrate the National Basketball Association.Carl Sandburg legacy is honored in a storytelling slam
UPDATE: According to the Carl Sandburg Home website, “Due to the government shutdown, Perspectives: The Sandburg Story Slam has been cancelled and will not be held on January 13. There…Smart Bets: Asheville Mardi Gras Twelfth Night Celebration
The annual kickoff to Mardi Gras season takes place Jan. 5 at Club 11 On Grove.Smart Bets: April B. & The Cool
The local funk/soul/hip-hop band plays Highland Brewing Co. on Jan. 5.food
Top Shelf Views: Asheville restaurant bars focus on dessert cocktails
When considering a dessert drink, “traditionally, most folks would probably think of a sweet cocktail,” says Jayson Landers, operating manager at Italian eatery Strada and its Social Lounge. “But there’s…(SATIRE) A Funny Taste: Asheville star chefs rebrand to taco-themed restaurants
Five celebrated Asheville restaurants announce plans to adopt taco-focused concepts. Also: A new city ordinance taps downtown retailers to support WNC's beer industry, and two beloved local coffee shops cave…(SATIRE) Rogue Beer Scout: Budweiser reveals plans for South Slope brewpub
The global giant sets up shop in Beer City, two new breweries join the scene and Scotty talks life post-Highland.Small bites: Will cycle for food justice
Gabriel Whitlock is raising funds and awareness for The Lord's Acre, one mile at a time. Also: Green tea class and tasting; Asheville Wine Focus Group; and Monk’s Flask.living
Christmas tree redux
As the holiday season winds down and decorations are packed away, disposing of Christmas trees sits at the top of the to-do list for many households. Even our region's most…movies
(SATIRE) Screen Scene: Local film news (that almost was)
For every "Masterminds," there’s a story of various factors that have derailed a major project from setting up shop in Western North Carolina.news
Asheville Archives: The John Robinson Circus comes to town, 1891
On Oct. 25, 1891, the John Robinson Circus arrived to Asheville, wowing citizens with its trapeze artists, menagerie and musical acts.As hot real estate market moderates, county approves earlier revaluation
Like an airplane leveling off after a rapid ascent, local Realtors believe the strong upward climb in property values in the Asheville housing market could be giving way to a…Asheville residents clamor for noise ordinance changes
Assistant City Attorney John Maddux, who serves as the city staff liaison to the Noise Ordinance Appeals Board, admitted that he currently had no good solution to the problem of…opinion
Letter: Thanks for making my case on civic clubs
"My service club experience was with the Johnson City Jaycees and the Mars Hill Civitan clubs, both now defunct. Could it be that the reason they failed is the loss…Letter: Do our part to avoid single-use plastics
"Many restaurants in Asheville have stopped offering plastic straws in response to this issue, which is an impressive step in the right direction. Straws, however, make up a trifling percentage…Petey and Chase by Chesney Goodson
Letter: Faith, love, grace and the Christmas Jam
"Warren Haynes’ 30th Christmas Jam was special. There is no doubt that the spirit of Christmas ran through me that night."(SATIRE) Same old song and dance
Crying about the year's area government scandals doesn't do much good — but bursting into song just might!(SATIRE) Advice from local notables
You asked, they answered: sage advice from Buncombe County Commissioner Al Whitesides, Dr. Carl Mumpower (chair of the Buncombe County GOP), Abby Roach (aka The Spoon Lady), former City Council…At last, the most wonderful time of the year
"I have a fantasy, sparked by a friend’s wistful Facebook comment, that everyone could come together to spread all of these many jolly activities (and their associated deadlines) throughout the…(Satire) Asheville’s sharing economy reaches new heights
Sharing is caring, as the old saying goes. But it is also proving to be a nifty way for start-up businesses to get a piece of Asheville’s economic pie —…(SATIRE) Revealed: Bear exposes dangers posed by humans
The most important thing is not to panic. Remember that most humans are just as scared of you as you are of them. Ninety percent of the time, they’ll run…(SATIRE) Jest of 2018: You’ve heard the best, now here’s the rest
Best place to find your soulmate while in Asheville for a bachelorette party The Pubcycle — All you have to do is shout “Woo!” loudly enough, and he/she/they shall appear.…(SATIRE) Xpressers’ almanac: Predictions for the coming year
2019 prediction: Town of Biltmore Forest will greatly expand its influence in county government by allowing trees to vote.